Try Again

It’s like a nightmare,

Just the thought of going up against him again,

Suddenly feel stripped naked and bare,

My whole being I must defend.

As if I’m back in the torture chamber,

Every nerve lain bare,

Failing completely to remember,

Any defenses I prepared.

Like the cream atop the milk jug,

Every insecurity surfaces,

Left alone once again with this thug,

I am at cross purposes.

Be courageous and fight for my girls,

Run, hide, find solace far away,

A myriad of hurts this next move unfurls,

Much to my ardent dismay.

Do I face a thousand more tiny pricks?

Day, after day, after day,

Or renew my efforts and get one big lick?

Either way I am easy prey.

I have mustered my courage time and again,

Only to be struck dumb by my attempts at defense.

But my children’s happiness impends,

Life is often lacking in pretense.

Charlotte von Wolfle Greer

Tuesday, September 25th 2018

Regarding petitioning courts for better custody again.  My PTSD is getting the best of me, even contemplating opening this can of worms again, and with no attorney as a buffer…